Soooo Glad That's Not Me

Ella at 23 months

Five months pregnant and sporting a nice baby bump, I was picking up 23-month old Ella from pre-school on a rainy day, when she decided to lose her mind and run away from me down the sidewalk of a busy street.  Again, it was raining, I was obviously pregnant and this kid was running away from me screaming like someone was pinching her.  Countless moms walked by me to pick up their kids.  I chased her down the street, and not so gently put her in the car, where I ended up sitting on the floor crying with her (still screaming), totally freaked by what had just happened.  I wasn't just freaked from Ella's behavior, it was more the fact that none of the moms acknowledged me.  None.  And then, about five minutes later, it was over.  She was in her car seat and ready to go home.  Awesome.  

Fast forward  four years.  I was bringing Cole to pre-school and he refused to cooperate (i.e., ran away from me in the parking lot back to the car wanting to be taken home, while screaming with tears streaming down his face).  I left him there.  I went inside to put away his things and signed him in.  I went back out and picked him up kicking and crying and gave him to his teacher, then I left.  How many moms passed me during this fun exercise of mom versus inexplicable nonsensical behavior with only looks of - soooo glad that's not me?

Reminiscing about those spectacular moments, I know that what bothered me most was the response, non-response, judgmental auras of passing moms. Truly.  Because guess what?  I know for sure there was, or will be a moment that you too will be in that same black hole of motherhood.  There are times when a nod, or a smile, or a look of - oh, I've been there sista!.. is all a mom needs to get through those agonizing minutes to persevere.

Sometimes just knowing that - Oh, I'm not alone - is all a girl needs.